Why reserve a table if you aren’t going to dinner?

These are challenging times that we live in; the earlier days competition for a man's attention was between secretary, girlfriend, wife, mistress and/or the closeted gay lover. Mostly hushed and back door in nature (pun intended) and rarely embarrassing, as women didn’t have access to internet, customized phone bills, friends to keep tabs or Facebook / Twitter to share and forward information.

It's okay if there is trouble in paradise once in a while, but choosing to live in chaos and trouble all the time is quite another thing. The dynamics today seem changed; it’s so refined that there is no grain left for a girl to derive good old-fashioned pleasure from dating and courtship.

  

Arranged marriages are still prevalent to preserve blue blood and family wealth. Irrelevant of gay or straight, the average age of marriages in India is 21-28years and since according to law, gay union is a criminal offense, gay men and lesbian woman remain closeted and like straight people they too take the plunge to please parents, dancing with pretense to uphold tradition.

For those who don't classify in the above category, there is dating sites, dating friends, lovers of friends, others husbands and wives and all combinations one can creatively think off, with the hope that one day they might hit jackpot with someone. 

Nobody wants to die alone nor sleep alone which is one of the reasons for the desperate searching, trying, exploring to satisfy ego, heart or simply the vacant mind. All this screams of the fear of the unknown and the thought of the coldness of old age shakes up everybody.

Interestingly, there is another group of people; those who don't seek a permanent partner or relationship, do not want to procreate nor seek the company of others for more than a brief period. These people know their needs and have a small black book to ensure their needs are catered to, as and when required.

These liberated people have invented the concept of need based, convenient sex, available on call or through any means of communication available, simply to stay in touch. One would have to assume that these modern thinkers come from a place of trial and test to have formulated this option as a result of errors observed, noted and/or suffered over the years. 

Considering the choice of convenient sex, it would be safe to assume that such people are medically certified to ensure that there are no medical repercussions for the participants involved at a later date.

This fraternity of happy people have redefined social networking by spicing up the sex, taking the pressure of responsibility off the handbrake, making orgies, blows jobs, finger fucks, fondling or french kissing just simple regular options on the menu card of what one can expect on ones first date or hook up, without emphasis on terminology or classification, since the outcome of getting laid, is of relevance and not the means used.

The best thing about this fraternity is that they are available online, offline and at remote site as well. Accessibility makes the offering simple and whatever is simple is popular for them; there is simply no need to make any extra effort, it's simply casual.

This group is fast growing but these participants were once simple minded, zealous and pure hearted dreamers, like all those who have not suffered the destruction of dreams nor seen the shattering of hopes, but they got tired of wasting their emotions on relationships which cause grief than joy; broken marriages, a live in gone sour, tired of waiting for Mr/Ms Right, etc.

These people chose to stop hoping and preferred to rather barter their dreams for a few moments of pleasure; something to take the mind off the wounds of the past.

Easy is good and the tough is best avoided. It's simpler to be told where to take the turn, than try new routes with challenges. Why aspire for a diamond when a crystal will also do. There is no need to aspire for special when mediocre is readily available. Better to have 50% than work towards 100%

What is our world coming to, the ever-increasing cynicism and defeatist attitude is alarming and depressing. Isn't life meant to be fought for, no matter what. Does one simply throw in the towel before the game has even begun or if the going gets tough? What’s with the population of quitters growing at such a fast pace. Are men and women becoming machines preferring to stop at the next available sex pump to fuel in every time there is loneliness, disappointment, failure or difficulty in ones relationship?

Is there a need for ten penises to have an orgasm? Is porn and casual sex replacing love and genuine intimacy? Can it really be fun to have relations with a person without emotions involved? Can physical intimacy alone be good enough to warm ones heart? 

How did we become so detached, distant and clinical? Why did people allow themselves to give up so quickly?

Is our generation filling up with cowardice daily, that with each blow that life gives us, we run into a hole where emotions, morals and values are tossed out since there is no room for them? A place where it’s easier to give up than to fight to set ones house back in order. 

Is this the moral fabric of the world coming our way? Are normal, sensitive, caring people with character becoming a novelty? Is falling and staying in love now going to win the next Nobel Prize because it is becoming rarer each day. Really!!!

Is there no room for love anymore or must people survive on alternates like porn, dildos, gigolos or community lovers for pleasures.

The taste of joyful pleasures, in the arms of a man with whom there is connection and love seems to a tall order from where we are today.

It's not necessary to name connection but it's important to have one. The joys of want and desire are not bad, when two people devour each other because their souls are knotted: body, mind and heart, all in harmony. Do such relationships not exist anymore or have men become rabbits. 

Is love only a forgotten fairy tale today? From the way it seems to be going, love is soon on it’s way to becoming a profanity than a word of affection.

How did we get here?

The very men and women who broke people’s hearts have set them up to become victims of alienation and compromise. The things that broke them now threaten to lead them. The things that offended them are now the values they embrace. Can they even see their own reflection in the mirror anymore or have they changed completely or is the mirror shattered.

How did we come here, why did no one notice the pain, why did no one care enough to reach out and mend the damage at its inception.

How do women who still hang on to hope, get through times such as these?

The good men seem taken a long time ago and a huge majority are happily gay. That leaves us with the rest. The particular rest who are defensive to gentle suggestions refusing to allow love to pass through the entry door, let alone reach them. Who are drunk in the stupor of weak choices and averse to being shown the mirror.  Who blast the music so loud, that they never hear the sound of their hearts. Who prefer intoxicants, causal conversation and humping, lest the thumping of the thoughts in their subconscious may catch them off guard, taking them off their course.

These evolved men are toilet trained to stop the tears, abandon memories and have sadly closed the door so tight that its impossible for any outsider to push it open and reach their hearts.

It's sad to see the victory of pain and the defeat of happiness. It's sad to see dreams tossed, since the eyes are no longer interested in looking for anything other than what's in line of sight. It's sad to see opportunity wasted each time one more person gives up. 

What are we choosing and why?

If there is no intention to sit down to dinner and start with a new beginning, then why reserve a table. 

To begin something new a few changes need to happen, the first being; leaving behind the burden of the old school bag, dressing up with an open mind, wearing a good fragrance of mystery despite the predictable erection, which is evident and yet essential every morning. Finally one would need to turn up leaving their self-created gated fortresses to meet a person midway if not all the way.

Should an opportunity be given a try, dinner can actually lead to an interesting beginning.

There is always hope for the brave but it is the coward that coronates everybody other than himself, making tall claims which he cannot deliver.

Open to life rarely comes with accolades or any guarantee of a happily ever after; we all fall, make mistakes, wrong choices, lose some - win some. But the one thing that open to life comes with, is preservation of ones soul, hope and belief, that as long as we walk forward, destiny will meet with us midway. Good things happen to those who are open to life, but sadly it takes its own time to happen and sometimes we have nothing to do but wait for our moment in time… but that’s better than wasting opportunity or selling oneself short.

Ladies, believe and hang in there, you never know what the new dawn will brings.  The wait might be over quicker than you think, so don’t give up. When it’s the darkest in the night, it is then that it is only moments before the break of dawn.

Don’t compromise; you are not a product of low self-esteem to use your body like a commodity. Use your body for fun and exploration but not as an act of desperation on account of advancing age, loneliness or compromise.

Life is a result of abundance given to us for eternity; the world is in existence till we are in the light. Do not choose a life of deficiency just because you have to wait for Mr. Right. You may be surprised that when you cant wait anymore is when he comes along. There is no GPS or road-map to find Mr. Right yet when the time is right destiny will make paths cross and the magic will happen.


It's always when you are about to give up that you are closest to reaching your pot of gold.Don't give up, just because others have or others tell you its an impossible dream, for those who never wake up at the break of dawn, it's difficult to explain what a spectacular sight it is. It's the same thing with dreams, they are yours and they are priceless, don't give up on them because others don't see it's beauty like you do.

Every princess has to kiss a frog or two, before prince charming comes along. True love will climb the castle and rescue the maiden, for in love no hurdle seems a hurdle and impossible is always easy. Sitting on the fence and looking at others lives will never give anyone any answers until you jump in and have your own experience.

So what if you got it wrong, the relationships that did not work out have taught you exactly what you want. So don’t give up just yet.

It better to love and lose than to choose to abandon self esteem and become a fuel tank at a sex pump, you never know when the pump runs out of gas, then what...

Stop, think and then choose…….. 

Why reserve a table if you aren’t going to dinner.